When Tang Chao Chen comes back to Earth
1 month on, since being on the popular dating apps...
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Yes, you've read it correctly, the hengweichen who never ever think much about dating is actually on not just one, but a few datings apps.
Surprise surprise surprise, or maybe not. Because it does follow very nicely from what I have been pushing myself to do this year - Putting my heart at the fore and letting her lead.
And just like how training of leaders are like, in order for them to lead well, you’ve got to expose them to the elements to have the best chance at leading well isn’t it? Well well well
So what's my prelim take? Well, not gonna lie but it does spice up my life cause I've learnt so much over this past month about interacting with strangers online. Ha, been real long since the heart is open to even wanna mingle. Gotten a clearer idea about how technology redefines dating, so much more fleeting and transactional (what you want and what you or the other party can give) but also how well it plays on the feel-good factor of being liked and of course fuelling the self-doubts when you don’t get one. So much emotions with just a simple click and I do see the lure of why some people would rather pay. Met quite a few interesting individuals, the one who appears honest but ended up being too afraid to walk the talk, the one who very purely just wanna chat and did just as that, and not forgetting those who desperately just wanted to show their masculinity and scaring the shit out of me. Many times I wonder what line am I treading on? Will I lose myself in the midst of all these “games”?
I do get bored honestly cause I am not a big fan of cold texting but... But, thank god for being slow to this exploding dating scene. For giving me sufficient time to think through what am I looking for and how much do I really need to have someone to spend my life with.
Though the answer is pretty clear, I can’t seal if off without giving a shot I suppose? And that helps a lot in getting myself clear-headed about what I’m hoping to achieve from these apps.
Definitely a good practice ground to learn ways of staying true to myself. And that includes being very honest in how I feel and think and to have faith in human beings. I know very well the stakes, the more trust you put in the greater the damage you may get but after so many years of innerwork I’ve gotten a very clear idea that if I’ve been genuine in wanting the best for people, whatever that the other party chooses to do, it will be his/her choice. And that I’ve done my best as how a human would to another human.
This clarity assures me that there's hardly anything to lose as I'm not in it to play games to begin with. Not virtually, and definitely not in real.
What a reflection and certainly a strong note to myself as well as those who believe in “sustainable dating”.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes, you've read it correctly, the hengweichen who never ever think much about dating is actually on not just one, but a few datings apps.
Surprise surprise surprise, or maybe not. Because it does follow very nicely from what I have been pushing myself to do this year - Putting my heart at the fore and letting her lead.
And just like how training of leaders are like, in order for them to lead well, you’ve got to expose them to the elements to have the best chance at leading well isn’t it? Well well well
So what's my prelim take? Well, not gonna lie but it does spice up my life cause I've learnt so much over this past month about interacting with strangers online. Ha, been real long since the heart is open to even wanna mingle. Gotten a clearer idea about how technology redefines dating, so much more fleeting and transactional (what you want and what you or the other party can give) but also how well it plays on the feel-good factor of being liked and of course fuelling the self-doubts when you don’t get one. So much emotions with just a simple click and I do see the lure of why some people would rather pay. Met quite a few interesting individuals, the one who appears honest but ended up being too afraid to walk the talk, the one who very purely just wanna chat and did just as that, and not forgetting those who desperately just wanted to show their masculinity and scaring the shit out of me. Many times I wonder what line am I treading on? Will I lose myself in the midst of all these “games”?
I do get bored honestly cause I am not a big fan of cold texting but... But, thank god for being slow to this exploding dating scene. For giving me sufficient time to think through what am I looking for and how much do I really need to have someone to spend my life with.
Though the answer is pretty clear, I can’t seal if off without giving a shot I suppose? And that helps a lot in getting myself clear-headed about what I’m hoping to achieve from these apps.
Definitely a good practice ground to learn ways of staying true to myself. And that includes being very honest in how I feel and think and to have faith in human beings. I know very well the stakes, the more trust you put in the greater the damage you may get but after so many years of innerwork I’ve gotten a very clear idea that if I’ve been genuine in wanting the best for people, whatever that the other party chooses to do, it will be his/her choice. And that I’ve done my best as how a human would to another human.
This clarity assures me that there's hardly anything to lose as I'm not in it to play games to begin with. Not virtually, and definitely not in real.
What a reflection and certainly a strong note to myself as well as those who believe in “sustainable dating”.