Moments of Life

What a week. 

Is it even possible to feel down, conflicted, comforted, and excited, blessed all in the span of a week? The planned and unplanned encounters with people, be it friends, colleagues or random strangers. I can’t help but conclude that universe really has a way to let us experience life that is best measured in moments. 

The stranger lady who gave me feedback about the redundancies of my bike. Thank you. You didn’t have to risk the discomfort of pointing out all these to a stranger who may or may not heed your advices, but you did, with the intention of wanting me to ride safely. I appreciate all the tips you’ve gave and it really prompted me to look into improving the set up of my bike. You’ve taught me that the heart to care is not only reserved for people we love. 

The three stranger uncles who stopped and offered to look for my missing earbud together in the dark. One even offered to lift up the dirty, ants-infected drain covers by hand to help me search for this bud in the leave stack. Thank you. Time is a very precious resource but y’all bothered to stop and check in on a helpless lady. Y’all have taught me that chivalry is still very much alive and doesn’t need to be performed by men in suits.

The cleaner uncle and his team of foreign workers who very gladly agreed to help me search for my missing earbud. Thank you. You didn’t have to take me seriously or heed my plea to look intently for a tiny earbud, but you did. You recognised that the earbud meant something to me and you took responsibility to ensure my earbud returns safely to me. Y’all have taught me that help isn’t always transactional, it’s not always about what I can give in order to receive. 

The diminisher and performative snr leaders who intentionally/unintentionally caused a big dent in my morale this week. Thank you. You reminded me how even with the rigorous selection & robust development plans org has invested in leadership development, undesirable leaders can still dominate at the highest level and be so impactful to our lives.  Y’all have taught me to be clearer about what I stand for, what kind of behaviours are bad and what I shouldn’t bow down to. Most importantly, how you are, have provided a very good example of the kind of leaders that I will never want to willingly follow. I refuse to participate in your little kingdom games. I’ll pass, fyip. 

Last but not least, the leaders and friends who have comforted me during my lowest. Thank you. You didn’t have to carve out time to clear my doubts but you did. You listened and you held space for my feelings to flow. You may not think much of your actions, but it meant a lot to me, to know that there are people who would genuinely care and take the time to address my concerns. Y’all have taught me that it’s not about the grand gestures, but the little ones - the withholding oneself to comment and just prioritise asking how I feel, the micro expressions (frown/signs of concern) when you hear abt my situation and reiterating your faith in me. At that moment, I really feel like I mattered and this means a lot. 

And so I say, universe really has its ways of letting us experience life that’s measured in moments. One day you are made to feel like shit by certain people or events and comes the next day, angels are being sent into your life to make it sweeter, more bearable and gave me the necessary boost to keep going. 

Just thought to word these out to remind myself that life is never gonna be smooth sailing, it’s always gonna be like this, sometimes up, sometimes shit, sometimes meh, sometimes we feel invisible, sometimes we feel like we matter but we just gotta believe that every of these moments are teachable ones and that we always have a choice to decide how much weight they should each bear in our life. 🌾